Living in Spain and bringing up a Spanglish family during the current 'crisis' and trying various ways to make some 'dinero'. Enjoying life in the sun, crafting and blogging as much as possible.

1 Apr 2012

The Art of Stupidity by John Simpson Moody

Written by a friend - now available on Kindle


A FUNNY BOOK
Little is known about the history of Rufus Comprehensive School, opened in the early fifties on the site of an old pig farm. An accurate, but unkind, observer had once been heard to say that little had changed. Both were long, low buildings full of noisy, smelly creatures. It was assumed that Rufus had been a Saint, but he could just as well have been the benefactor’s dog.

EXPLOITS OF AN ACCIDENT PRONE TEACHER AND HIS GROUP OF FRIENDS
“Oh yes! Well, what you have there is Adzuki beans and Agar-Agar on a bed of Kombu and, to wash it down, a nice refreshing Amazake.” Sidney just stared at the waiter. “Red beans on seaweed with millet rice cordial,” he added in a whisper. “And the white radish looking things on the side plate are Daikon, good for dissolving mucus deposits.”
Sidney refrained from asking if you ate them or just shoved them up your nose.
A LAUGH ON EVERY PAGE
When ready they headed for the pine door and entered amidst clouds of steam. Stumbling forward, they collapsed onto the bottom wooden bench and sat there blinking. Slowly it dawned on Sidney that a pair of legs appeared to be straddling his head and turning became aware that he was staring into the naked crutch of an extremely hairy man. Not stopping to think, he shot up and stumbled from the cabin, leaving Isabel blissfully ignorant that she was sitting amongst half a dozen members of the local nudist club, who had also taken advantage of the free coupons in the paper. But he was not alone for long, there was a shriek, then the door flew open and Isabel careered past him, tripped and fell head first into the freezing plunge pool. Sidney, plus two naked men who had followed her, rushed to the side and one of them, grabbing her wrists, pulled her bodily from the water. The freezing temperature had silenced her screams instantly, but being confronted at close quarters by a large male appendage as he hauled her vertically, the scream came back so loudly, that the man fearing he was hurting her let go. Mouth wide open, she descended once more into the freezing depths.

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